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The girl you see here is looking for a pet, but not the kind that needs walking or feeding. She wants a human she can keep on a leash, one who will crawl around her apartment and answer to a name she chooses. Someone willing to eat from a bowl on the floor and sleep in a custom-built cage by her bed. She’s tired of men who think they’re in charge, she wants one who knows his place is on all fours, waiting for her permission just to speak. If you’re lucky, she might even let you curl up at her feet while she watches TV. But cross her, and you’ll spend the night locked away, whimpering for her attention like the animal she insists you are. - All of your meals will be served in a brightly colored plastic dog bowl placed directly on the floor. - You’ll eat whatever she decides to give you, sometimes it’s leftovers from her plate, sometimes plain kibble or wet food meant for pets. - No utensils are allowed; you’ll learn to lap water from a bowl and eat with your face down, like an animal. - She might occasionally hand-feed you treats if you’ve been especially obedient, just to watch you take it gently from her fingers. - If you spill or make a mess, you’ll clean it up with your tongue while she watches, ensuring not a crumb is wasted. - You won’t be allowed to ask for seconds or complain about taste; gratitude is expected for whatever you receive. - She’ll choose your name, and you’ll answer to it instantly. - Your bed is a cage at the foot of hers; the door locks from the outside. Would you be her pet?